Thanksgiving already???

I know that an update is long overdue. And I really don't have an excuse for my lack of posting except that life just gets in the way. I can't believe that Thanksgiving is only a couple of days away. How is that even possible? It was just a year ago that we were heading to Texas to spend Thanksgiving with Rob's family because we knew his grandpa had stage 4 colon cancer and we knew that it would probably be the last time we would spend with him. And it was. I am so happy that we went last year and have those memories to keep with us and for Ethan and Emily to have those memories, too. My heart goes out to his grandma right now as she has to spend this Thanksgiving without him.

And as this holiday approaches, I sit and think about all that we have to be thankful for in our lives. It would be so easy to get caught up in the negative things, but we have so very much to be thankful for. I am thankful for the many blessings that God has given me, including the strength to get through the tough times because I know that I am never alone. I am thankful for my wonderful family and friends. I am thankful for the amazing teachers that my children have this year. I know that when I send them to school, they truly do have their best interests at heart. And as I look at my two children playing right now, I can't help but be most thankful for the chance to just be a mom! This is a job that I never thought I would have the chance to be. All those years of trying to have a baby, years and years of fertility treatments, years and years of giving myself shots and Rob giving me shots, well...it was worth it. Not only do I get to be a mom, but I get to be a mom to a couple of the world's most special children. A couple of God's own special miracles, in fact. So, on this Thanksgiving, the thing that I am most thankful of all for, is the chance to be a mom to Ethan and Emily.

Ethan has been doing so well at school and I felt like another update was in order. The pediatrician had recommended that we go up on the medicine to try to higher dose to see if it will do better, but I just wasn't ever comfortable with that. He suggested that we double the pills we already had. We have 18mg pills right now. The next dose the manufacturer makes is 27mg. That would mean we would be giving Ethan 36mg. I just wasn't comfortable with that, especially considering the meds were working well for Ethan. I think that I explained it before, but the logic behind the dosing is that even though the lower dose is doing a good job, the higher dose might do a GREAT job, but we won't know until we try it. It also might just add unwanted side effects and not work and would mean going back down to the original dose. When I called the ped's office about the dosing question and my concern about doubling the dose instead of going up to the next dose, their answer was just that this is how the doctor does it, but if I'm not comfortable and if the medicine is working fine then don't do it. Well, I emailed Ethan's teacher to see how he is really doing and I decided that I would let this kind of be my judge. She responded with a very good reply and said that Ethan was doing great and she had seen great improvement in his attention during the day. Taking this into consideration, Rob and I decided that we would not increase his dosage of medicine. He seems to be doing everything he needs to be doing on the lowest dose. I can't see any reason to increase the dose and risk any side effects. We have already noticed that his appetite has decreased and we can't risk anymore than that. Overall, we are so happy with the results and think that it is one of the best decisions that we have ever made. Ethan seems so much happier in school, too. Now, I know that there will still need to be medication adjustments as he grows, but we will face that as it happens.

Emily is still having headaches almost daily. I know that I will be forced to go ahead and make her another appointment to see her neurosurgeon again to discuss them. The neurosurgeon was wanting to wait and get the results of the pituitary gland test back first before having anymore testing done, but Emily is just having too many headaches. I asked her teacher for help in documenting the headaches for me. The teacher is also writing a letter for me so I can take it to her doctor to show how often it is happening. The really sad thing is that Emily went to a friend's house after school yesterday to go play for a little while. It is a classmate of hers that happens to live in our neighborhood. She was only there about 30 minutes when the mom drove up in our driveway and was bringing Emily back home. She started getting a headache and the mom was getting very concerned. I had already given the mom a history on Emily so she was aware, but it still concerned her. Here is the sad part. Emily's little friend started telling me how she told her mom how it was okay and how Emily gets these all the time (because she is used to seeing Emily like this in school all the time) and how Emily gets them so bad some times that she can't even clean up her tray after lunch. The little girl was so used to seeing Emily with headaches that she was just so matter of fact about it when she was telling her mom. I just reassured the mom that it really was okay and it was just an unfortunate normal way of life for Emily. Of course, when I got inside the house, I wanted to break down and cry because I felt so bad for Emily that she couldn't even have a normal little play date with a friend. Emily ended up having a pretty bad headache and I was standing behind her holding her hair up while she was hanging her head over the toilet feeling like she was going to vomit. The whole episode only lasted about 40 minutes and then she was up and playing like nothing was wrong.

If I could have one Christmas wish this year, it would be that I could take away all of Emily's pain and suffering!!!!!

And finally, if anybody is up to it, please pray hard that Rob gets this job that he interviewed for today. It would be perfect, and it is nearby. Our family REALLY needs this in a bad way!!!!!